A very dear friend died last week, quite unexpectedly. He got the Swine Flu and five days later was in ICU, fighting for his life. Each hour brought worse news and last Monday his wife called at dawn to tell us he'd died a short time before. We were stunned. He was in good health, a busy man who worked full time, exercised, played golf and ate sensibly. He watched his weight, his alcohol intake, took his vitamins. You know, all the things that are supposed to lead to a long life.
His wife is reeling, and left to pick up the pieces of her life. The future she'd envisioned is gone and she says she feels empty. I ache for her. Friends and family flew in from all over and his funeral was a lovely testiment to the fine man that he was. I stayed for almost a week and tried everything I could do to help her find comfort, but it was all inadequate. I left her, pale and weeping, to get on a plane to come home to my healthy man and my busy life.
It hurts. Carpe diem.
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Kathleen:
ReplyDeleteYou and your friend's family have my sympathies. There's really not much anyone can say or do in a tragedy like an untimely and unexpected death.
I too have been where you are now, many times. There'll probably be many more before anyone mourns for me.
One of the thoughts I get every time is that one way, perhaps the best way, to honor my loved one's memory is to carry on what he or she stood for, to live my life in a way that would make the deceased proud of me.
I hope this helps. It's the best I can do.
Sincerely,
Mary Anne Landers
www.facebook.com/maryannelanders
Thanks, Mary Anne. It's a month later now and we're remembering all the good times we had. I suspect we'll always miss him, but his legacy, his loving family and friends, live on.
ReplyDeleteWhat a shame. It is so hard when someone young, who has everything to live for dies so unexpectedly. It can shatter a family. My husband's father died at 46 and my mom at 47, both very unexpectedly within weeks of falling ill.
ReplyDeleteYour friend and her family will be in my prayers. The hurt will be so raw for a long time. Focus on the good memories. The memory of the plans made and future not shared will be bitter sweet and hit you when you least expect it.
Both my DH and I have learned to cherish every moment. We don't want to be where many people find themselves when a loved one passes away regretting the things not said or done.